Introduction
This research note presents initial descriptive findings from the online survey conducted within the MatGuilt project (“Maternal guilt – Measurement, correlates, and policy solutions in the Italian context”). The project investigates the prevalence, distribution, and consequences of maternal and paternal guilt in the Italian context, focusing on its effects on work-family reconciliation, employment, and childbearing decisions.
Previous research has consistently shown that mothers continue to bear a disproportionate responsibility for child-rearing compared to fathers and are more often held accountable for their children’s well-being (Jackson & Mannix, 2004; Buzard et al., 2023). As a result, when mothers fail to meet societal expectations of the “ideal mother”—one defined by extreme physical, emotional, and intellectual dedication to their children—they often experience “maternal guilt” (Guendouzi, 2006; Henderson et al., 2010; Liss et al., 2013; Rizzo et al., 2013).
However, fathers are not exempt from feelings of guilt. They may experience guilt when they are unable to spend sufficient time with their children or fail to meet financial expectations to support the family. Understanding the extent and nature of parental guilt is critical, as it has been linked to adverse outcomes such as reduced life satisfaction (Foucreault et al., 2023) and depression (Derella & Milan, 2021).
Moreover, we argue that parental guilt – and especially maternal guilt – may be associated with reduced labor force participation and lower fertility intentions—two particularly relevant issues in Italy, a country characterized by persistently low female labor force participation (ISTAT, 2023) and exceptionally low fertility rates (Eurostat, 2022).
In this note, we describe how parental guilt was measured in the MatGuilt survey and present initial descriptive findings on its prevalence and variation across different groups of respondents. By examining these patterns, we aim to shed light on the extent to which feelings of guilt differ by gender, offering insights into their potential implications for work-family dynamics and demographic behaviors in contemporary Italy.
Our findings underscore that parental guilt is a significant phenomenon in Italian society, affecting both mothers and fathers. While socio-economic and cultural factors shape its intensity, gendered patterns persist, particularly for mothers balancing work and family.
Data collection
The MatGuilt survey was conducted between November 7 and November 25, 2024. Using a CAWI (Computer-Assisted Web Interviewing) method, the survey was administered by IPSOS srl across Italian regions. The survey primarily focuses on mothers but includes three additional comparison groups – fathers, childless women, and childless men – for a total of 6000 respondents between 20 and 50 years old. For the purpose of this research note we restrict the focus to mothers and fathers.
Beyond items aimed at capturing feelings of parental guilt, which we describe in detail below, the questionnaire covered a wide range of topics, including: respondents’ partnership status, partner characteristics, children (e.g., number and age), education level, subjective income, and region of residence, as well as participation in the labor market (respondent and partner), work orientations, time spent with children, division of household chores between partners and fertility intentions. Additionally, the survey included items measuring respondents’ traditionality, such as gender role attitudes, religiosity, and political orientation.
How is parental guilt measured?
Parental guilt is a multidimensional concept. Building on previous research, we developed a Parental Guilt Scale consisting of six dimensions that, in our view, capture the most significant components of guilt (Table 1). The scale was carefully adapted to the Italian context, accounting for cultural nuances, the varying age of children, and the experiences of both mothers and fathers.
| Guilt arising from a sense of responsibility | I feel that it is my fault when my child misbehaves. |
| I blame myself when something bad happens to my child | |
| I feel bad when I am unable to take care of my child myself | |
| I feel that I am a bad mother / father when I do not prepare a homecooked meal for my child or when I give my child fast-food | |
| Guilt for experiencing negative emotions | I get worried when I am experiencing unpleasant thoughts in relation to motherhood / fatherhood such as regret, boredom, and despair |
| I feel that I am a bad mother/father when I lose my patience or get angry at my child | |
| Guilt from unmet parenthood expectations | I worry that I am not a good enough mother / father |
| Situational guilt | I feel guilty when I take time for myself, go out with friends, or engage in my hobbies |
| I worry that I am not exposing my child to enough educational and recreational activities | |
| I feel guilty when I spend time with my partner and not with my child | |
| I feel guilty when I do not earn enough money to support my child | |
| Parental shame | I want to sink into the floor and disappear when my child does not behave appropriately |
| I feel ashamed/judged when I get angry at my child in public | |
| Family-work guilt & Work-family guilt | I feel that I am constantly behind with work because of my child |
| I feel guilty because my career suffers due to my responsibilities as a mother / father | |
| I feel guilty when my child gets sick, and I must go to work | |
| I worry I am not spending enough time with my child because of work |
Certain adjustments were made to ensure relevance. For instance, items specifically related to very young children were excluded to maintain applicability across different child age groups. Additionally, some dimensions were presented only to relevant subsets of respondents: for example, work-life balance guilt was measured exclusively among respondents in paid employment, while guilt related to not spending enough time with a partner was limited to partnered respondents.
Each subtype of parental guilt included one or more items, with the entire scale comprising 17 items in total. The dimension of work-life balance guilt was further divided into two components: work-family guilt, which reflects guilt stemming from work interfering with family responsibilities, and family-work guilt, which captures guilt arising when family obligations interfere with work.
Respondents were asked to evaluate their level of agreement with each statement using a 5-point Likert scale ranging from “strongly disagree” to “strongly agree.”
Results
Figure 1 below illustrates the distribution of guilt across the 17 items. As shown, respondents’ experiences of guilt vary significantly across the different subtypes. Guilt is most commonly reported for not being able to take care of the child themselves, for not being a good enough parent, and for not earning enough money to support their child. In contrast, respondents are less likely to feel guilty about taking time for themselves, spending time with their partner instead of their child, or giving their children fast food.
With respect to work-family reconciliation, Italians are notably more prone to work-family guilt—feeling that work interferes with family responsibilities—than family-work guilt, where family obligations hinder professional performance. The majority of respondents feel guilt for not spending enough time with their child due to work and for having to go to work when their child is sick. In other words, respondents are more concerned about how work hinders their ability to be a “good parent” than about how parenting might impact their effectiveness as workers.
Thus, the overall distribution clearly indicates that Italian parents experience guilt regarding certain—though not all—aspects of their parenting.
Who feels guilty?
We then examined differences in the level of parental guilt across various socio-demographic groups. To this end, we constructed a cumulative measure of guilt by summing the responses to the different items on the parental guilt scale. Since some items were only answered by specific subsets of respondents (e.g., those who are employed or partnered), at this stage we restricted our analysis to the first 12 items, which were applicable to virtually all respondents.
This cumulative measure of guilt ranges from 0—indicating no feelings of guilt whatsoever—to 48, representing the highest possible level of guilt.
To begin, we first examine gender differences in parental guilt. Surprisingly, as shown in Figure 2 below, mothers and fathers report similar levels of guilt, with mothers reporting only slightly higher feelings of guilt. This finding challenges common assumptions that mothers experience significantly higher levels of parental guilt due to their traditionally greater involvement in child-rearing and societal expectations of motherhood. Instead, it suggests that fathers, too, may internalize pressures to meet parental responsibilities, highlighting a possible shift in parenting roles and expectations in contemporary Italy. Our results (not shown here) indicate also that the level of guilt tends to decrease with age, and that for mothers—but not fathers—guilt is lower when their children are older compared to those with younger children.
Socio-economic characteristics also play a significant role in shaping parental guilt (Figure 3 – Left panel). Individuals with higher levels of education report stronger feelings of guilt related to parenthood. In contrast, lower material well-being is, as expected, associated with a more pronounced sense of guilt. Interestingly, for mothers, longer working hours somewhat intensify feelings of guilt, while this relationship is not observed for fathers. This raises an important question: do mothers face more obstacles in balancing work and family responsibilities? Or is working long hours not a source of guilt among fathers, who are normatively expected to be the main economic providers in their household?
Values play an important role in predicting the level of parental guilt (Figure 3 – Right panel). Parents with traditional values are more likely to experience higher levels of guilt, which could be attributed to the elevated expectations of parenthood associated with these beliefs. Specifically, individuals who hold traditional gender role attitudes and report higher levels of religiosity tend to feel more guilt regarding their parenting. For women, political orientation also matters: those with centrist political views report higher levels of maternal guilt compared to their left-leaning counterparts.
Conclusion
This research note explored the prevalence, distribution, and determinants of parental guilt in contemporary Italian society, drawing on data from the MatGuilt project. We examined how guilt is experienced across different socio-demographic groups, its connection to socio-economic conditions, gender differences, and the role of cultural values.
Our findings reveal that parental guilt is a significant and multidimensional phenomenon, experienced by both mothers and fathers to a similar extent. While the overall levels of guilt are comparable across genders, the underlying factors and triggers vary. Mothers, in particular, are more affected by work-related guilt, likely reflecting the ongoing challenges of balancing work and family responsibilities within a context of persistent gender inequalities.
Socio-economic factors also shape parental guilt in different ways: low income amplifies guilt, while higher educational attainment is associated with greater guilt—raising questions about higher parental standards or time constraints among more educated parents. Age and the child’s life stage further influence guilt, with older parents and those with older children reporting lower levels of guilt.
Notably, traditional values—including gender role attitudes and religiosity—emerge as key drivers of guilt. Parents who adhere to more traditional norms experience heightened guilt, likely due to internalized expectations of what constitutes “good parenting.” This highlights an important avenue for policy and cultural change: promoting progressive values and reducing rigid parenting expectations may help alleviate guilt, particularly among women.
Addressing parental guilt is not merely about individual well-being but also has broader societal implications. Reducing feelings of guilt could foster greater female labor market participation and support fertility intentions, two critical issues in a country characterized by low birth rates and low female employment.
In sum, parental guilt reflects deeper cultural and structural challenges within Italian society. Tackling these issues requires efforts to support parents—through work-family policies, cultural shifts, and gender equality initiatives—to create an environment where both mothers and fathers can thrive as parents and workers.
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